II

[…CONTINUED...]

 

                The elections had come and gone and things had gone back to normal; the dust raised by the elections had settled and people had gone back to their normal routines. The little money Charles and Ben made from their political jobs had been used up and they were back to square one, wondering what next was up for them. Six months into the new government and there was nothing tangible to make people breathe a sigh of relief. It was majorly litigation after litigation and elected officials sharing the portion of the National cake they had access to; with their friends and family. The anticipated progress seemed like a mirage. The promises and ‘agendas’ were like water under the bridge. However, six months was too early to call.

                Among those feeling the disappointment were Dave, Ben and Charles. They are in a bar close to their house, thinking of what to do; over bottles of drink which Charles had sponsored. He had just come back from a brief travel.

  “How is your hand today?” Ben asked Charles.

  “The pain is not as bad as when I had the accident during that election time,” Charles said.

  "When last did you massage it?"

  "Professionally or personally?"

  "That place you usually go to massage it locally."

  "I don't have money to pay that man again. I am doing it by myself now."

  “Running with ballot box was never a good idea,” Dave said and sipped his drink. “I warned you.”

  “Na the money wey remain from am buy you this drink now,” Charles said. “Nonsense.”

                Ben laughed and they joined.

  “No mind me jare,” Dave said. “I happy sey they no waste you sef.”

  “Me I look the thing as e be,” Ben said. “I no come continue again,”

  “Chicken heart like Dave,” Charles said.

  “Guy, that thing no be work for young man wey get future,” Ben said.

  “But the money pass wetin civil servant dey get in one year,” Charles said.

  “But the risk meehn,” Dave said.

  “Life is full of risks.”

  “So if you see another opportunity, you will take it?”

  “Yes na. I for hama well well if not for the accident wey make me stop. Just few weeks work, I almost buy motor. What are you not talking?”

  “But why e be say na only illegal work dey pay pass for this country?”

  “Na so dem don spoil the country reach.”

                Ben brought out his phone to surf the internet.

  “When person put im mind for good work,” Dave said. “Na so so story dem go dey tell.”

  “Shee for that your job abi?” Charles asked.

  “As in eeh. Dem dey make plenty money o. If you see as dem dey carry money for bag go bank eeh, you go shock. Yet to pay person well na wahala. Ok the chikini one wey dem agree to pay, dey go still wan chop am, delay am on top.”

  “This country na ‘monkey dey work baboon dey chop’” Charlie said. “Na why I don lock up. Anything I see, I go do. Na money I wan make, I no kill person.”

  “I believe say e go better sha. Na just trial and temptation.”

                Charles eyed him.

  “This church wey you don begin go sef don enter your head.” He said to Dave. “You wan use church cover the real situation. Everything na temptation.”

  “Ehe na,” Dave replied. “God wan know wetin I go do if my blessing delay.”

  “If Im know finish, wetin Im wan use am do? Im no see say person dey roast?”

  “Guy relax, God’s time is the best.”

                Charles eyed him again.

  “Dey dia dey wait for God’s time,” Charles said. “You fit wait forever. As e be me now, any opportunity I see, I dey take am sharpaly.”

  “E good to be patient,” Dave replied. “The patient dog dem say na im dey chop the fatest bone.”

  “So the dog go waaaaiiiit, dem go chop the meat finish, na bone go remain for am, im go now chop am. Wetin dey inside bone?”

  “I am just saying sha. Na so dem talk.”

  “Oboy change that nonsense mentality o. As things dey tough, tough up your mindset join. No dey dull.”

                Ben touched Dave.

  “I just dey browse how person wan take make money for this country,” he said.

  “Ehe, which one you see?” Dave asked, his face beaming with excitement.

  “This one na talent hunt.”

Dave and Charles burst into laughter.

  “As you don old reach, you wan go do talent hunt?” Charles said.

  “Nothing dey dia," Ben said. "Age no matter. Na the money be the main thing.”

  “Wetin be the talent for this one?”

  “Singing.”

                Dave and Charles burst into laughter again.

  “You think say you be 2baba?” Charles asked, still laughing. “Wetin you sabi sing?”

  “I fit just try sha,” Ben said laughing. “You never know.”

  “Talent hunt na waste of time o. Na based on who know who.”

  “But the money no be here o. 1^st price winner go carry 5 million plus motor. Which work you wan get wey go pay you that amount? You go don work like 3 years first.”

  “Aswear.”

  “This country tire me o. Person wey graduate, get first class sef no dey see this kain money. Na person wey sabi sing ordinary sing. Na wa.”

  “They no dey encourage education at all.”

  “Who education epp for this country now? Certificate wey rich people dey buy anyhow.”

  “Na talent be the koko now o. On how you sabi sing come release one single wey hot, you don blow o.”

  “Or you manage feature Phyno or Davido, you don buy house for Banana Island be that.”

  “Or you sabi act enter Nollywood, you don hama.”

  “Or you sabi play ball, you don make am.”

  “As in eeh. See wetin these guys dey make per week. Person dey kill imself dey find certificate.”

  “Certificate good sha. At least e show say you get education.”

  “Who e epp? That paper fit pay my bills?”

 “All these celebrities sha get educated people wey dey help them manage their money and things,” Dave said with a shrug. “So e no bad.”

  “De console yourself,” Charles said. “I wish say I find my talent early in life. You fo de manage my money for me.”

  “E never late o. At least you sabi carry ballot box.”

                They burst into laughter.

  “Una dey mad,” Charles said. “Ben abeg browse another thing. Talent hunt no work.”

  “Abi o,” Ben agreed. “If to say na BBN now, eheeeee.”

  “You say wetin?” Dave said. “That one wey people dey do anyhow inside.” 

  “Baba,” Charles said, touching Dave on the shoulder. “E no matter.”

  “You know how much dem dey carry?” Ben asked Dave. “Plus endorsement deals.”

  “No mind am,” Charles said. “On how you enter there come out, you don become popular o. Even if na you dem first evict. Your gain no get limit. Na on how you take package yourself.”

  “No be lie,” Dave agreed. “But to enter no easy.”

  “Na the thing be that,” Ben said.

                Ben touched the screen of his phone and scrolled.

  “See this one,” he said. “Bidding for quotation to supply things.”

  “What type of things?” Dave asked.

  “E depend on the company wey put am. This one na building materials…this one na agricultural products.”

  “Which site be that sef?” Charles asked.

  “One site where dem dey post opportunities to make money.”

  “The thing with all those supply people na sey some of them no pure. I remember one of my friends wey do am last year. The person wey need am tell am say im need one trailer load of rice to share to im community people during Christmas. Na before election. So my guy run around o, borrow money, enter motor go north, find way carry the rice come. Na im the man say im no need am again. my guy vex. As im no fit do the oga anything, im just beg am make im just pay am money wey im use buy am. After other people put mouth, the man collect the rice, pay my guy half, tell am say im go pay am the remaining when im win election. Unfortunately, the man no pass primaries sef. Na so my guy money take go o. Im come dey sell im property take pay people wey im borrow money from. When property finish and creditors still dey, my guy disappear o. Nobody know where im dey till now.”

  “Na why e dey good to collect the money first.”

  “Who wan give you money first na? Make you carry the money run?”

  “Nawa. Na risky business.”

  “I no do am lailai.”

  “But you fit start with small money something wey even if e loss, you no go feel am well.”

  “The gain no go much na, considering expenses. Na inside bulk supply gain dey."

  “Na true sha.”

  “This country sef. Why people no dey trust people?”

  “Are you a learner?” Charles said, laughing. “Here wey people dey find who they go chop mugu on a regular. Even brother fit use brother brain sef.”

  “The best thing na to just travel abroad.”

  “You don go embassy recently?”

  “No.”

  “Space no dey dia o. Guys dey sleep outside Embassy for night just to get VISA comot this country, and some na VISA to third  world country sef.”

  “Travel abroad sure pass but e no easy. To go those countries wey money dey no easy. You go pay agent plenty money and on how e no work, the money don go be dat.”

  “I get friend wey im papa sell land pay agent to make papers for am. The thing no come work. Money go, land go, how person wan take tell that kain story.”

  “Na to use study visa travel.”

  “That one too no easy. Schools don lock up now o because dem know say people dey use school travel.”

  “I go look into am make I know which way possible.”

  “The only way e de easy na if you get person abroad wey get money, get mouth, get leg, wey go invite you, sponsor you, do papers for you, you come travel.”

  “Seriously.”

  “But e no dey like this before o. To travel no dey hard.”

  “Yes now. In the 60s, 70s, 80s, to travel abroad dey very easy. We no de gree travel sef. Na oyibo people dem dey beg our papa and mama dem make dem come.”

  “I no know wetin make my papa no travel that time," Ben said and hissed. "I for be citizen there now.”

  “Things don spoil now. To get VISA travel na big testimony.”

  “Guy, people don tire for this country. Nothing dey here. No infrastructure, no steady light, no opportunities for young people, nothing.”

  “If them say everybody wey wan travel abroad make dem come airport, nobody go remain for house o. Naija go empty aswear.”

  “Na as e don bad.”       

                The waiter came to their table and asked if they need extra drinks.

  “Who will pay?” Charles asked.

  “Sorry bro,” the waiter said. “Seeing your bottles almost empty, I thought you need another round.”

  “We will call you when we need ok,” Dave said.

  “Ok.”

                The waiter left.

  “Una need extra bottle?” Charles asked.

  “Leave am,” Ben said. “Make we use that money chop for night.”

  “Yes,” Dave agreed.

  “E no go reach anywhere for food na,” Charles said.

  “Small food stuff wey I collect from my mama still dey,” Dave said. “Na to buy small things join.”

  “That your mama don save us o,” Charles said.

  “Aswear,” Ben agreed. “If no be am eh, person for don carry plate enter road.”

                They laughed.

  “But to dey go carry foodstuff from her dey shame me,” Dave said.

  “she dey complain?”

  “At all. Na she dey call me self dey ask if the last one wey she give me don finish, make I come carry another one.”

  “You see. No reason as you dey reason.”

  “She don suffer train me. Now wey I suppose take care of am, I still dey collect foodstuff from her. Nawa”

                He sighed.

  “No think am,” Charles said to Dave, squeezing his shoulder. “E go better. Na just a matter of time.”

  “No wahala sha.”

                Ben put his phone back in his pocket.

  “I don tire to browse all this work sef,” he said

  "Nothing de dia guy," Charles said. "The only thing wey fit sure now na..." he reduced his voice, "yahoo"

  "No ooo," Dave said. "Oyibo don wise up o so nothing de dia unless you wan put hand in diabolism."

  "Use your destiny do collateral," ben added

  "No way dey easy guy," Charles said.

  "Then when sars remember you, you go hear am."

  "Taaah nothing dey happen. Na just say I don old for that. I no fit follow small boys carry laptop upandan."

                Suddenly, Dave froze.

 

 

[TO BE CONTINUED……]

 

.........................................................................................................................

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